Becoming aware of our language is an important part of learning to implement Choice Theory in our lives. We are immersed in a world where people use blaming and threatening language to get what they want. We often unconsciously use language that comes from external control.
Some of the words we use out of habit include the following.
"She made me angry" "It makes me..."
Katy Perry's song "The One That Got Away" has a chorus that says
And in another life, I would make you stay, So I don't have to say you were the one that got away
In essence we cannot make someone do something that they don't want to do
"Firstly you have to ..." "He has to be..."
Sarah Mclachlan in her song “Do What You Have To Do” says
I know I can't be with you, I do what I have to do
We are surrounded by external control language. Bringing to a conscious level what we are saying is the first step eliminating these words from our vocabulary.